Poll: Study shows more graduates dissatisfied with current job market

A recent study released by the Pew Research Center reveals that 68 percent of college seniors who graduated in the past four years “absolutely could fucking not believe this bullshit job market.” In addition to this 68 percent, a small 7 percent said they “could fucking believe it, but I was a computer science major so…”

The remaining 25 percent fell in the middle with 12 percent answering “it’s so much worse than I thought” and the final 13 percent responding “who even has three years of experience?”

“You really have to feel for grads right now. I mean your options are either bathing in debt as a grad school student or bathing in debt as a Starbucks barista,” said chief researcher Doris Milam. “It’s tough to see so many kids struggling, but I don’t make the market, I just study it.”

Class of 2015 graduate Mark Castro said he knows his long term career goals to be a professional comedian are not realistic for a recent grad, however he has seen significant difficulty even landing a position with the four-year journalism degree he received at the University of North Carolina - Chapel Hill.

“I definitely answered that I ‘absolutely could not fucking believe this bullshit job market,’” Castro said. “I was really torn between that one and ‘who even has three years of experience.’ I mean I knew there was a lot of bullshit, but this is like record-breaking. I bet I could sell my degree online for more than I make now, and trust me I’ve considered it.”

Milam said many of the study’s results were expected as it's only gotten harder for recent grads to get jobs post college.

“We’ve seen a significant increase in both the ‘it’s so much worse than I thought’ and the ‘who even has three years of experience’ categories. We’ll always see the CS kids land something quick, but that isn’t the case for most students.”

Class of 2014 graduate Laura Cook said she was completely oblivious to the job market when she graduated and was blindsided by the distinct lack of opportunity.

“I mean there have been multiple times where I get through a three year required interview without knowing the skills and then have to spend the night in a RedBull fueled rage trying to learn what I said I was proficient in. But I thank college for teaching me how to handle these types of situations.”